Pain

Siegel senior killed in wreck
Waking to this news, the phone call you watch your daughter make, knowing that her world will change forever in an instant when she hears her friend say their friend died from a car wreck.  Knowing a mother within very close proximity to you is struggling to know how to draw her next breath because the pain is so great from the giant gaping hole in her where the soul of her child once lived and breathed but is now gone, ripped from her in a mind numbing tragedy.  My own mind can't focus, it jumps from wanting to do something, something to soothe the hurting of others and my own pain, to wanting to grab my own child and hold her tight, to try to shield her from the hurt and pain, it jumps to thinking about what would I do if it was me and then quickly shutting that thought out.  Inside I am writhing, feeling twisted, sucker punched by this death demon.  Angry he came here again.  We just dealt with his last visit a few months ago, in less than 2 years he took Halley, Jeff, Robert, Mark, daddy and a host of others that I don't know.  He needs to go to a place of no return.  Praise God that he will one day.